Now that I got your attention, lets talk about it. How do we get it? How do we keep it? Let’s go…
I like to start with the anatomy of a relationship. In most cases, especially when we’re young, we start with the physical connection. And there’s nothing wrong with that. But what happens when we realize that’s all that there is? We tend to move on to something deeper or something different. Sex can be amazing, but it is never enough. Sure, some of you may keep a “friend with benefits” around. But if the sex was enough, you would lock them down. See what I am getting at? You’re going to have to go deeper if you want amazing sex.
What I have seen in my 35 year mental health practice, is the natural progression of the 3 steps. The physical, mental and then into the spiritual. I’m not going to lie, my wife is a beautiful woman. But had it not been for the fact that we vibed from day one, I doubt we’d still be together almost 2 decades later. I have never met a couple in a long term relationship say, that sex is the main reason why they are still together. I’m sure it can happen. But I think that is like a unicorn. Extremely rare. So yes, my wife’s looks got my attention. Her personality and her optimistic view on life kept it.
Getting back to the 3 steps. If we think about it, we start with the physical, and generally within a few years we move into the mental. Things in common and mutual respect become the foundation of the relationship. And when we’re together for a long time, it tends to become about something bigger than the relationship. It becomes about family, community and service. But what would happen if we reversed the steps? We started with the spiritual, moved into the mental and ended with the physical? The answer? Amazing sex.
Any relationship built on a soul connection that has mutual respect AND, has a physical attraction will lend itself to a life time of gratification. On all levels. And once you have tasted from this cup, I promise you will never thirst for anything else again.
You may be looking for amazing sex. You may even find it. But if you want to keep it, you’re going to have to surrender the notion that looks will be enough. But I bet deep down you already knew that.