Empath

Vance Larson
2 min readDec 3, 2023

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Cold water is to a hot day, to what a deep breath is to stress. A life saver. Empath. Good at listening. Bad at letting go. Lets get into it…

Empath. Who the fuck wants that? So many people are claiming the title empath like it’s a badge of honor. Feeling peoples pain and holding onto it, is the kiss of death. I’ve spent 38 years in mental health and I’ve been really successful at not taking on their weight. And while I too can feel energy, I let that shit go in real time. That’s the secret to my longevity. Especially doing crisis and first response work on and off for 20 years. Imagine holding onto that energy.

It is a beautiful thing when we can empathize with someone who is suffering. But we can do that without taking on their energy. I love the saying, “Don’t let people pull you into their storm. Pull them into your peace.” Powerful, and words to live by. Just because you can feel energy, doesn’t mean you need to claim it. Bring something tangible to them. Bring them peace.

People find peace in many different ways. Me? Meditation is my preferred method. But I am also really big on not talking about my stressors, pain and other irritants. Life can totally be overwhelming sometimes. Talking about those pains day in and day out, only makes them more pronounced. By all means talk about your trauma in a constructive, supportive environment. But sitting with it and making it your identifier, only incarcerates you. Please stop.

Find a mechanism which produces peace. If you can’t stop taking on other peoples energy, then start removing yourself from people that willingly unload on you. Sometimes a little distance is how you take your power back. You can be an empath, but let that shit go. In real time. Because we all have stuff. Make sure you’re not carrying around another’s.

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Vance Larson

I am a retired crisis counselor of 20 years. I share my experiences {both personal and professional} about thought provoking subjects. Follow me.