I Get It

There is a great line from an old movie, where a young man said to an older gentleman, “How’s life?” The older man replies, “Taking forever.” I love that line. And the older I get, the more it resonates with me. So, let’s get into it.

I’ve got some years on me. In fact, more years behind than ahead. It’s cool. But as I look back at my life, I realize just how blessed I am. And the reason why I am blessed is, because I have always surrounded myself with people much older than me. I don’t recall it being a conscious decision. But I did it none the less anyway. I mean, most of my friends were older than me. And not just by a couple of years. But 10 to 20 to be exact. I routinely dated women much older than me as well. Hey, you vibe with who you vibe with.

As you get older, you start to realize a few things. I am still relatively young. But my life has tracked at a rate faster than most people my age. Just in the past 4 years alone, I’ve lost my daughter, brother, father, my 2 aunts and a couple of friends. Fuck bad things happen in 3’s. Life took a big swing at me. Yet here I am, still giving thanks. Still…

Having spent 39 years working in mental health, I’ve learned to read people. When I think of that line, “Taking forever”, I get it. When the years haven’t been kind and most of them are behind you, the thought of death no longer scares you. In fact, many welcome it. And why wouldn’t they? Most of their friends and family are gone. Their bodies are riddled with pain. People discount you on a daily basis. I’m only 59 and it happens to me all the time. Oh yeah, ageism is alive and well. So I get it.

So maybe try and suspend your judgement. Despite all the pain, all the problems and all the horrific things that I have endured, I am the most optimistic person you would meet. But many have already checked out. They’re already dead, but the body remains. Cut them some slack or simply shut the fuck up. Because I am in the gym 365 days a year at 4:30 in the morning, I can still probably out work, out hustle and outlast most people half my age. But the beauty of getting older is, I prove nothing to no one.

With my sense of humor intact, I admit there are some really funny things about getting older. I don’t mind the jabs. Lord knows, I jabbed my friends too. I laughed at them because they were different. They laughed at me because I was the same. Checkmate mother fucker. And at the end of the game, they truly won. They looked different, talked with a depth, and were thankful for every little thing. We could all take a page from that play book. And if we did, I promise you life would be more beautiful, more meaningful and more loving than you could ever imagine.

I know, I know. You don’t get it. But if you’re blessed with enough time…you will.