Tank Empty

Oh Hell no. That was my thought when my phone rang at 12:30 in the morning yesterday. I had just gotten to bed, and had been asleep for about 30 minutes. I have not been a crisis counselor in over 2 decades, but I still make myself available as best as I can for my clients. The problem is, that some will try and take and take. How about you. Do you have anyone in your life like that? I didn’t pick up the phone. And nor should you…

Boundaries are our lifeline to sanity. If we don’t protect ourselves, we will be tossed around like a ship on the ocean. Simply put, out of control. No is a powerful response. It is also a powerful affirmation. No is a force field that declares, I decide when and who to give my time to. How many times have we not activated that force field? How many times have we done things against our better judgement? If you’re still struggling with this, make today the day. Declare to yourself that no is not only acceptable, but it is necessary.

I didn’t pick up that call because the tank was empty. Had it been a life threatening situation, of course I would have mustered up the energy to engage. But I knew the player and the game. Shooters shoot. I’m not upset, nor are they. But they have learned a little more about when it’s acceptable to call and when it’s not. This is how you validate yourself. This is how you take your power back.

There will be some who will try and push past your force field. But it’s a trap. No means no, means no. We literally teach people how to treat us. And if they put up an argument, baby, they are not in your corner, nor in your tribe. Those who really take an active interest in you will understand. So what if your friends list clears out a bit. Do you want 100 pennies in your pocket, or 4 quarters. While they both spend the same, I’ll take the 4 quarters. Easier to manage, and have a greater value. See what I am getting at?

Tank empty? The way to refill is deep rest. Deep rest comes from the power of saying no. So say it. And tank empty will be no more.




I am a retired crisis counselor of 20 years, and have spent the last decade working as both a Life Coach and Hypnotherapist.

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Vance Larson

Vance Larson

I am a retired crisis counselor of 20 years, and have spent the last decade working as both a Life Coach and Hypnotherapist.

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