Temperature

I was meditating {as I do}, and started thinking about my marriage. By far, the most solid thing I can think of in my life. I know some must get sick of how well my wife and I get along. In over 2 decades of being together, we have never had a fight. We’ve never really even had a sticking point. And this is for two reasons. But during meditation today, one really stood out. And that is temperature. Let me explain…

We both have mastered the art of reading energy and the art of the bounce back. Case in point. Last Friday, wife was having a high pain day. Being disabled, she has so much to contend with. I run a rapid response team. I am often running to people on the worst day of their life. It can be complex balancing everyone’s emotions. But I digress.

My shift ended and I had to make several additional stops on the way home from work. Not really a big deal, but add that onto the already hour commute, I was ready for the week to be over. When I got home, my wife started firing at me right out of the gate. Nothing terrible, she was just asking for help. literally one foot in the door, I said I would need a minute.

Fast forward over the next 5 minutes, we just could not get in sink. The wife said she was going to let me be, and would see me later. I dropped everything, which included my attitude {which I didn’t think I had}, gave her a hug, and said lets have a good weekend. I then proceeded to help her.

The temperature {mine} was rising. Hers was dropping. We both could feel it. Within minutes, we were on track, and got caught up on the days events. We had an amazing weekend. The art of the bounce back. Neither of us needed to be right. Neither of us committed any offenses. We both responded with love, compassion, and kindness. I helped her with her needs. She in turn gave me the rest of the night off to decompress.

We both choose peace, not pride. There is no ego involved in a healthy relationship. We understand that her wins are my wins. My wins are her wins. It really is that simple. You can ask anyone in our lives. Family, friends or co workers. You could search both of our social media from the start of us dating. You will never find a time when we weren’t supportive of each other. I attribute that to temperature. We are so in tune with each others temperature.

If little things often become big things in your relationships, perhaps it’s time to start checking in with each other. That is our secret. From early on, we always made time to talk to each other. That grew into meditating and praying with each other. There isn’t much going on with each other, that the other does not know about.

Now I don’t know if that makes for a successful relationship. But what I do know is, that neither of us have been the source of a headache for each other. Ever! And why is that? Because we constantly take each others temperature.