The 3 Date Rule

I was listening to the radio the other day, and they were talking about a study done on the 3 date rule. What is the 3 date rule? The 3 dates is supposed to be enough time to get to know someone before you sleep with them. Experts say that 3 dates is enough time to see if you are compatible. The study looked at how people met. Dating apps, meeting in a bar, being set up, it really didn’t matter. Most people were having sex prior to date number 3. The exception, work relationships. Work interest took up to 10 dates to get together. Why did this study catch my interest?

People get together for various reasons. And at the end of the day, it is none of our business. I mean, are we really shaming people these days about how many people someone has slept with? I personally have had a very rich dating life. I’ve dated women with a low body count, and I’ve dated women with an extremely high body count. What’s my point? I didn’t care what their past was, only that we were safe.

We connect with, who we connect with. And if someone is counting or keeping score, there may be some deeper issues going on with them. You don’t need to feel bad about your count. Nor do you need to wait to engage in sex. I’ve played it both ways when I was dating. As a young man, sex was important to me. Some women I slept with on the first date. Others, it could have been as long as a month or two. And you know what? It didn’t make a difference either way, in terms of chemistry. People can be who they think you want them to be. Eventually though, the real them comes out, and then game over. It wouldn’t have mattered if you waited a year…

I guess this study struck a cord. If the energy is there, go for it. The first time I spoke with my wife on the phone, I knew we had chemistry. The first week I met her, I gave her a key to my house. And the first time I saw her, we hooked up. 20 years later, she is still the most interesting person I know. So much for the 3 date rule. I guess what I am saying is…do you. Be safe. But if you’re in a good head space, don’t give it a second thought.